I've been feeling a bit out of sorts lately, not quite feeling like myself. I can't put my finger on it, which really doesn't bode well since I have a big race this weekend.
Coach and I have targeted the Myrtle Beach Half Marathon as thee race to crush my half marathon PR and set the tone for the coming year. But my friends, I'm missing that excitement, that fire in my belly. I've been battling. Battling a dodgy knee since the end of December, battling cupcakes, battling feelings of inadequacy, feeling like I don't measure up in so many ways. I'm pre-occupied and have lost all focus.
I've been hitting the peanut butter jar, two-fisted.
Folks I won't lie to you, I still have these battles. Yes, I've come a long way on this journey of mine, but it is a journey. It is filled with hills and curves, with asphalt and rocky roads, and sometimes wrong turns, flat tires or busted radiators!
So why am I writing this. Why am I sharing with you these private thoughts and feelings? Because I know we all have them. And we all need to remember, myself included, that we just need to keep moving. That yes, we sometimes take a wrong turn. Sometimes we stall and sometimes we get a flat, but eventually we'll find our way back on the road. As Jyl always told me, "Just keep going."
I have no earthly idea how this weekend will go; physically, mentally or emotionally. And I have to be okay with not knowing. Another very good friend of mine, whom I will refer to as The Jedi for the moment (and I hope she doesn't mind me quoting her here), said "Worry is a misuse of the imagination."
I will now imagine myself in a bright green supercharged VW Bug named Hermes, with bright orange flames painted on the sides cruisin' down the strip.
Pardon me folks, my chariot awaits.
See ya at the finish.....