Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Words for Wednesday

It's hard to dance with the devil on your back,
So shake him off.

- Florence + The Machine
"Shake It Out" 
Ceremonials (2011)

Friday, October 24, 2014

Thank you Juan Pablo

Last weekend when I was working at the store, I was witness to a very odd conversation.  Which, it is a store that specializes in triathlon gear and what not, so we do have many odd conversations; but this one really tops the podium...

The scene fades in.
Two young women enter.  One is a competitive open water endurance swimmer, the other competing in her first 70.3 in Miami. They are browsing the store, random chit chat ensues while the triathlete decides on her nutritional goodies.  They both walk up to the register, in no particular hurry, until the swimmer sees the stick of Body Glide near the register....

Swimmer:  OOOH  Body Glide!  I wonder if this would prevent me chaffing in my longer 3 mile swims.
My Thought Bubble:  3 mile OWS?  I would surely die before chaffing would be an issue.
Triathlete:  Hey, do you think they have that numbing gel they were talking about?
My Thought Bubble:  Numbing gel?  What on earth....
Swimmer:  I don't know?
Me:  Um....What exactly are you looking to numb?
Triathlete:  You know....for down there (motions to her nether regions)....for when I'm on the bike.
My Thought Bubble:  Did she just say what I think she said?
Me:  I can't say that I would willingly and intentionally, or encourage anyone to, put on something to make lady parts go numb.....
Triathlete:  (blank stare)
My fellow sales associate:  That is one area where I would definitely want to keep the blood flowing.....
My Thought Bubble:  BAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Triathlete: (blank stare)
Me:  What kind of saddle do you have??

Which leads me to today's Public Service Announcement.

Ladies and Gentleman.
If you are riding your bike and your nether regions go numb, SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT.  Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Take my lead on this one.  Load up your faithful steed and proceed directly to your bike guru.  Have him look at your position and definitely look at getting a new saddle. The right fit on both will ensure your parts keep working as they should and your long bike rides will immediately become (cough) pleasurable, without the use of numbing gels.

It may sound like I'm poking fun, and I am a little because it was hysterical!  BUT I can write about it and poke fun at it because I've been in that same predicament.  My guru helped me choose a split saddle.  The Adamo Prologue to be exact.  And his name is Juan Pablo.

There are multiple variations of the type, open nose, closed nose...whatever, I don't pretend to know all the ins and outs. What I do know is that each has an opening that safely cradles all that we hold dear.  They are not cheap, nothing in this sport is, but I firmly believe that this is the one (cough) area where you should go ahead and make a serious investment.  Your nethers will thank you.

So, I owe a debt of gratitude to James for introducing me to Juan Pablo.  And thank you Juan Pablo for proving to me that chivalry is NOT dead by protecting this lady and all her parts through lots of miles.  May we share many many more long comfortable journeys together!

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Words for Wednesday

You can either flip turn like a bad ass or flip turn like a bad synchronized swimmer.  
Either way? You're still flippin'!

fake it till ya make it, folks.... 


Friday, October 17, 2014

Decisions, Decisions

I need some help.

You see, one of my closest and dearest and most awesomest of friends is running a marathon in a few weeks.  We were all going to run.  She was doing the full marathon and we were going to do the half.  Well, then life happened, for the better in this case.

Since I can't run, I have committed to be the best sherpa/spectator/cheering section EVER.  And to make this happen, I need YOUR help.

If you were running a marathon, who would you rather see on the course (in no particular order):

A)  King Kong and Ann Darrow
B)  Batman and Catwoman or Poison Ivy
C)  Superman and Wonder Woman or any other cool superhero/villian
D)  Peter Pan and Tinkerbell
E)  Chewbacca or Hans Solo and Princess Leia
F)  Any other suggestions you might have

This is pretty important stuff, folks.  I need input....
And fast.

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Things You Thought You'd Never Hear Me Say

  • I miss doing planks
  • 24 hour relay in the mountains?  I could be talked into that...
  • Sour Patch Kids?  No thank you.
  • Century ride?  Why not...I haven't done one yet. And yes, 100 miles does sound like fun.
  • I don't want to watch any more tv
  • I love avocados
  • I can't wait to to have 4:30 am wake up calls again
  • Would I like a ride home?  No thanks, walking is good for me.
  • I'm sad I missed out on all the late season open water swims.
  • I don't want to drink smoothies ever again.

Okay, that last one is a bold faced lie, but I had to come up with one more to make it an even 10....

Thursday, October 9, 2014


I was supposed to be on a plane this morning.

I was supposed to be traveling to a city unknown.

The long overdue excitement finally hit me.  I was ready.  SO READY!  I was ready for my own little adventure, to break out of my little bubble and anxious to explore and experience the Windy City on my own, so completely focused on running the best 26.2 miles I have ever run.  I was looking forward to challenging myself and blow apart one of my goals and possibly meet the wouldn't-it-be-freaking-awesome-if goal; you know,  the one you only tell a select few about.

I was ready.

I'll tell you what I wasn't ready for.

I wasn't ready to stop.  I wasn't ready to end my season just yet.  I made it through an entire winter and spring of Ironman 70.3 training and a summer cycle of marathon training injury free.  Any athlete will tell you that making it to the start line injury free is more than half the battle.  I was at my peak and in the best shape of my life.  Or so I thought.

I was't ready for my internal organs to revolt and attack me.
Stupid non-essential organs.

Not an uncommon surgery, but a major surgery nonetheless.   As the good doc said, after he told me to chill the heck out, "small incisions do not mean small surgery."  Small incisions big enough to put me out of commission for a month.  Big enough to watch the Chicago Marathon pass me by.

I know what you're thinking.
Quit your moping.  It's just a race.  It's only a month.  Put your big girl panties on.

And you are right!

Now that the anesthesia and all the pain killers that end in 'codon are out of my system, I'm up and walking 2 miles a day instead of wiping drool from face.  I'm back laughing (I'm talking about those good 'ol belly, laugh-till-you-snort-or-pee-your-pants moments) with my peeps at the coffee shop. I'm feeling like my sassy self more and more every day.

And even though Chicago might be passing me by, I'll be looking ahead to what's coming up.  I have a session in a few weeks to map out my master plan for 2015.  I'm on a freaking AWESOME new triathlon team (HOLLA Tri Team Ignite!!!) and get the opportunity to get to know some pretty fantastic sponsors with top notch services and quality products that I get to learn about.  After I'm cleared for duty, I'll have had a month's rest and because my season is over, there is no urgency to jump all in.  I can ease back slowly and safely, building a strong base to take me into next season.

I may have been stopped short this year,
but next year I will be unstoppable!

And a quick note to Chicago Peeps:
Good luck to everyone running on Sunday.  Hate to miss it, but my heart is with you.  
May your feet be swift and gels be tasty!

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Thought for Today

Goodness knows I have my ups and downs, highs and lows.
Some things could be better or could be worse.
There are lots of things that I could do better to be better.

But when it comes right down to it,
I really do love my life.

Happy Wednesday, my friends.
It's good to be back!