Sidelined.

I'm writing to you today more out of frustration than anything.  I'm afraid my worst nightmare is coming true.  Injury.

It all started this past Monday or so.  A slight soreness in my foot, more like the ball of my foot.  It was a little ouchy, but it seemed minor so I kept going.  I ran my normal routine that morning, weights as usual on Tuesday and running on Wednesday.  Well, after Wednesday's run, I began to have trouble walking and it has steadily gotten worse.  I thought if I just chilled, took Friday off from activity that maybe it would get better and I thought it had.  Now today, I'm struggling.

I didn't feel like myself yesterday, I don't know why.  But, when I was eating breakfast this morning, trying to figure out what the heck I could do for some activity without doing any damage, I came up with nada.  Nothing.  And then I knew what was wrong with me yesterday.  I didn't do anything! This whole correlation between exercise and mood experts keep talking about...I think they're on to something. 

So, what am I battling today....fear, depression and let's be honest...just pure bitchiness.  Training starts Monday, but the way it's looking, I'll be heading to the doctor.  I'm scared that they'll find something that will put me on the sidelines which brings me to my ultimate fear...if I stop, will I start again?  I'm feeling sad, I feel like I want to DO something, but what can I do?  Hiking is out, walking is a struggle, the bike is out (pressure on the ball of my foot is like driving a nail in between my toes), the eliptical is out and I've already done strength training for the week.  Any more and my muscles will never talk to me again. So, what do I do?

Scary times for me, people.  Scary times.

Time flies.....

I happened to look at my Google calendar and almost had a panic attack. Just as soon as I got used to the In-between (and loving it!), this "10K Madness" training starts in five days. FIVE! Inconcievable. That means only one more run-whatever-the-heck-I-want-too day left! I am beginning to question this decision. Seriously, what in the world was I thinking?! Am I going to be able to handle this Fartlek thing? Can I really increase my speed and do I really want to? I'm kinda liking my turtle speed right now. Hill training? WTF. Am I sane?

Regardless of all the questions and hesitation I have right now, bottom line...I got myself into this, now I have to finish it. I've already put my money down and opened my mouth; and since I said I was going to do it, I have to follow through. I'll keep reminding myself this will bring me one step closer to running the Boilermaker in July 2012 with Mr. Cross Country Runner Extrodinarre, otherwise known as my nephew, Adam (and any other Dunlaps and relations that may want join in the torture fun).

While I still question my sanity, training starts with an easy 3 on Monday. The bright side? That's pretty much what we've been doing already, so that's a plus. Bad news, the following Monday is a 4 mile Fartlek. Once I figure out what that is, I'll let you know.

Wish me luck...and stay tuned. This might be entertaining...

The In-between

Merriam-Webster defines in-between "as a state or position that is in the middle between two other things."  I'm finding myself within a few in-betweens at the moment.  In-between school semesters, in-between a crazy-busy time at work, and I find myself in-between running goals.  You may have read, I participated in a 5K  race a week or so ago, not a great showing I might add.  My next running adventure will include a 10K race mid-September.  Of course I'm nervous, excited and eager to get our training in gear.  But, the training schedule doesn't start until June 1.  So, I find myself at a loss of what exactly I should be doing from now until then.

Yes, I need to work on speed.  Yes, I need to work on endurance and yes hills are still my nemesis.  But all these things will be included in our training plan, a plan created by someone who knows what there doing.  So.  What should I do? 

After that 5K, I discovered something.  I'm not comfortable.  Not at the pace I've been doing.  I kicked it up a notch before I was really ready to, and tried to maintain that.  The consequence has been misery.  Nothing felt right and getting 3 miles in was becoming more difficult and frustrating. 

This past week, I just ran.  I didn't worry about time and I really didn't worry about distance.  I simply ran.  Yesterday I did a route that I'd been struggling with, always walking right after a certain hill, feeling like I was going to stroke out.  But yesterday, I slowed down and I was pleasantly surprised that I was able to do the 3 miles without much problem or discomfort.  For today, I planned to do 4.  Midway through, instead of taking the right onto Crescent Rd toward home, I went left!  Inconceivable!  What is even crazier is that after I finished what turned out to be 4.9 miles and was walking back to my car, I realized that I had it in me go go further.  I don't know how much further mind you.  Just, further.

I can't tell you what an accomplishment and confidence booster these past two days have been for me.  So, I've realized what I will be doing in this in-between.  Get comfortable. That's my mission.  I can work on the other stuff in a month, and I'm not going to worry about it until then.

So if you find yourself in an in-between, just run.  

p.s.  if you happen to be driving and see me in the road, please don't run me over :-)

Race Recap - Town Day 5K for Davidson/Cornelius Day Care

Well, I've seen better days.  It all looked promising with my new running apparel, hot oatmeal and successful attachment of the timing contraption to my sneaker.  Pre-race was alright.  I was a little anxious....they posted a different course and there was a lot more people there than my first race, but still, all was well.  Kevin was happy taking pictures at the Farmer's Market and he promised to be at the finish line.  And then....we were off.

My friend, Eileen, was just ahead of me, and she slowed her pace so she could run with me for a bit.  1st mile was good.  Imagine my surprise when dude called out 9:35 at the mile mark....11 seconds off my previous pace!  I was in good shape to finish under 30.  Then WHAMMO.  The entire upper portion of my abdomen felt like it was under a vice-grip.  I couldn't breathe, I couldn't concentrate...holy stitch Batman.  I couldn't stretch it out, I couldn't breathe it out.  I had to do walk.  Then, when I started walking, ligaments started snapping over my ankle bone.  Not an uncommon thing, but not an easy thing to deal with.  It would have been okay if I could just relax my entire body, but the pain in my stomach combined with the pain in my ankles...all I could think of was "Well Shit.  How in the hell am I going to finish?"  I even dropped a few choice cuss words, and I apologize to all those around me...it was a family friendly event after all . 

Thankfully, Eileen stayed with me.  She didn't have too and I felt bad that she did, I mean, she gave up her own race because she was worried about me.  Don't get me wrong, I'm THANKFUL she did, because I don't know if I would have kept going if it was for her.  Then we made it to the around-3-mile-mark.  At that point you can hear the finish line.  Everything magically went away for a second.  It was like I felt my legs working for the first time in 30 minutes, and we crossed that wonderful red line...in 32:50-something.

Not the best morning.  And I was very disappointed I didn't beat my PR.  And then after some reflection, I've come to a conclusion and I said to myself "DUDE!  You're still a beginner.  You're still figuring this all out, and it takes longer than less than a year of running on a treadmill and 2 small races in the past 2 months.  Cut yourself some slack!"  So I've made up my mind to focus on the positive:
1)  I finished.  Looking back, I should be proud for finishing.  You see, my abdomen is still in pain.  Something must not have been right if it's still being ornery.  And I still finished. 
2)  A hug from a running mate always makes things better.
3)  I got a cool shirt.
4)  It was another experience that brings me another step closer to being a runner. 

So...when's the next one?

Race Day

So.  Today is the day.  My second "race".  I'm awake, so that's a plus.  I've got my oatmeal cooking, so I've got that going for me.  I have my running shorts on , sneakers laced and Body Glide ready to go.  Hubby is up and out of bed and his coffee awaits.  2 hours 'til the start...and how do I feel?

Excited and nervous, and a bit apprehensive.  I know I can finish, I proved that to myself a month ago.  So why am I so worried about it?  Is it all about beating my PR? Maybe. I can't quite put my finger on it.  Hopefully after a few more races under my belt, this uncertainty will go away, but until then I will just try to go with it, eat my oatmeal and be happy.

An hour until we leave.  Hopefully that's enough time to figure out this timing contraption I have to put on my sneaker.....

Will it be under 30 today?  We shall see....Town Day.  Be There!

Are you sure today isn't Monday?

...because it sure as hell felt like it!


It started with a 5am wake up call to get to the gym to get in my last workout before the race on Saturday. The monsoon was slacking off, but was still raining pretty good so we had to go inside and hit the treadmill. I was still a bit sore from yesterday's spinning deal (worst 35 minutes of my life), I mean whose idea is this cross training thing anyway. So, this morning was a battle just to get 3.1 in and it makes me doubt myself for a good personal performance on Saturday. I'm not going to sugar coat it. It felt like crap. Am I ready for Saturday?? Here's to hopin'.

Then, by 8:00 am I'm in the dentist chair with a screeching drill jammed in my mouth. After a river of drool and a numb mouth, I'm out the door with a temp crown that has be replaced in two weeks (I'm so excited that I get to do that all over again.). I try to make some consultations to find a way to save my plum tree that is about to take a nose dive in my back yard courteousy of the previously mentioned monsoon. I'm on my way to work, without coffee, without cigarettes (today is supposed to be my quit day). I stop at my go-to Exxon that has the best coffee in town....except for this morning. WORST CUP EVER! Now I'm stuck with this stop-smoking herbal tea concoction. Whatever.

I get to work. I log onto my machine like I do every day. Open Outlook and necessary software applications including Pandora. I must work with music. Silence drives me absolutely batty. Then whammo. Pandora....why aren't you working? After a losing battle with Pandora and Grooveshark...I remembered the 'ol stand by: Media Player, it's better than nothing.

So, after suffering through music I thought was cool ten years ago, the day didn't get too much better, but what are you going to do? Here's to a better tomorrow. Cheers!

Let's start a movement. Running Wear for Real People

Now I know I'm not a big girl, but I'm not tiny either.  But when I try on a pair of shorts, I don't need to be lookin' like I got a big 'ole bubble butt or have these things riding up my woohoo.  Seriously people.  Why don't you make some clothes that are more friendly for those of us who don't have the racer's body?  I'm not sure if they're doing it to try to motivate us?  If so...it ain't working.  How 'bout you design something for us that will make us WANT to put it on and run proud instead of stuff that makes us want to hide behind trees when a car passes by?

I think that's all I have to say about that.